FakeNews- Balotelli, Keshi Or Osaze Likely To Become Next Pope

Following the shocking resignation of Pope Benedict XVI, a lot of confusion and speculation has surrounded the identity of his successor. While the process of electing a new pope is now common knowledge, its apolitical nature and the fact that it is shrouded in secrecy leaves many to resort to speculation as regards an outgoing Pope’s immediate successor.
As a direct consequence, many have tipped Nigeria’s Cardinal Arinze, Ghana’s Cardinal Turkson and many other Cardinals to succees Pope Benedict. However, Fake9janews undercover correspondent, Mr (cant say his name, he’s undercover) has unearthed a shocking shortlist of 4 possible candidates to the Papacy.
They include (in No Particular order
1.        MARIO BARUWAH BALOTELLI

Rumor has it that Mario Balotelli’s move back to Italy was influenced by his ambition to become the next Pope. “I went to Italy to be closer to the Vatican when the time came” he told our reporter. “If I become Pope, I would like to be called Pope Mario II, because 2 is my lucky number”.
2.       STEPHEN OKECHUKWU KESHI

Stephen Keshi was also surprisingly shortlisted to be the next Pope. A Vatican Spokesperson was quoted to have said “If the man can lead The Super Eagles to Victory, then he will surely make an excellent Pope”. We contacted Coach Keshi and he said he actually handed in his resignation so as to contest for Pope. He has since rescinded his decision saying he can handle being Coach amd Pope perfectly well.
3.       RAFAEL BENITEZ

We hear Chelsea Fans worldwide nominated Benitez for pope, so he can finally leave the club. They also nominated Torres to be Chief Altar Boy, which the Vatican vehemently refused, saying Torres would always “MISS” morning service.
4.       PETER OSAZE ODEMWINGIE

Osaze Odemwingie was the 1^st on the scene when the Pope resigned, but he was not allowed into the Premises of St. Peters Basilica.However, he is still a strong contender for the post, especially since he is the most active of the 4 on social media. If he wins, he’ll take over the @Pontifex Handle.